Technology....

I did promise to blog every month, and I’ve struggled to nail down one topic for February’s blog. I’ve been all over the map and had a few different scenarios pop up that I would typically blog about, but didn’t know how to address them without offending anyone. Which stems a different topic – I never remember being offended so easily nor do ever recall some of my friends being so harsh (we'll save that one for another day!). With that being said, I’m going to throw a couple of different ideas for you today, and you all let me know your thoughts on each of them.

Choices

Oh, you all know how much I love this topic. So many people like to point fingers or place blame or feel sorry for themselves or just take an overall attitude of ‘it’s not my fault.’ Well, let me tell you friends – it may or may not be your fault. But the truth is – you have a choice. You have a choice on how you deal with a situation. You have a choice as to whether or not you accept responsibility for a situation or whether you waste the time and energy placing blame somewhere else.

Perhaps this idea has made me a bit….insensitive to some situations going on in my friends lives, but I’ve very much taken the attitude of ‘I’m sorry that you’re having a problem/crisis/situation. I feel terrible for you and I wish I could help. What are doing to fix the problem/crisis/situation so that it doesn’t happen again?’ If the answer is nothing – well then, I’m sorry. Next time, you’re going to have to cry to someone else.

As I’ve said a million times, without really knowing who I am quoting, is ‘the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.’ So the choice is simple – do nothing and complain to someone else. Or, do something, anything, regardless of how effective is – but make a choice that you’re going to make a change. Then, and only then, can you point a finger and say, it’s not my fault. Because you know you’ve made choices and taken steps to change the problem/crisis/situation. And at that point in time, we can crack open a bottle of wine and work through it over and over and over again until we figure it out!

Again, that may sound insensitive and on more than one occasion I’ve had to ask myself ‘does this make me a bad friend?’ But really, at this point in our lives, we all spend so much time pointing fingers and placing blame – without thinking, ‘I have a CHOICE’ as to how to handle this situation. And all we’re doing at the point in the game is perpetuating the cycle.

I warned you, I may offend a few folks today!

Facebook/Twitter/technology

We’ve all talked about the technological world that we live in today, with constant access to the internet and texting and email and twitter and who knows what else! It seems like with all of these ways to communicate that we would be better at it. But, I think it’s actually hindered our ability to communicate effectively. I honestly believe that I’m losing my ability to effectively communicate my feelings face to face, because I have the opportunity to hide behind technology. Being someone that enjoys writing and relieves stress by doing so, sending an email is way easier than actually talking a problem out.

The reason this comes to mind as of late is the two ‘arguments’ I’ve gotten into with friends over the past few weeks – neither of which did we actually exchanged a word.

First of all, Facebook is a SOCIAL networking tool. When I think social, I don’t think work. I don’t think my professional life (have you seen the photos on my fb!?) has anything to do with Facebook. Hit me up on LinkedIn if you’re interested in my profession or if you’d like to share yours with me. So when a friend hits me up on FB for something that has to do with their professional life, well, sorry friends, I’m not apt to follow. I had to stop following/being a fan of Britney Spears because I kept getting ‘notifications’ from her – so I don’t want to notifications from whatever it is you’re selling. If you’d like to sell me something or need my help with your professional life – call me/email me/ hit me up on LinkedIn – again, I’m happy to oblige.

The point (or story) I’m getting to here, is that when a friend continually requested I follow their company via FB and I jokingly said I didn’t want to – I really, really offended that person. Apparently this was ‘very important’ to them and their career, and if I was a good friend – well then, I’d know that! Well, the automated note from FB asking me to follow your company – didn’t scream – THIS IS IMPORTANT TO ME! It said, hey, my work has a FB page – wanna follow? And the answer, is no. I don’t.

Which then stemmed a nasty argument where name calling ensued, and for once, I didn’t start it! And by the end of it all I was angry and offended and hurt – and NOT ONCE did I speak to this person. Thanks technology!

Another, much more minor and completely not as dramatic situation is where a friend chose to share their dislike for something via Twitter, versus calling/emailing/texting me directly….in which case said friend was a little upset that I didn’t take her seriously. And by the time she reached out to me directly and expressed her (not joking!) opinion – well, I was already annoyed that she didn’t talk to me directly about it in the first place, and was less than sympathetic. Thanks again technology!

Two completely avoidable situations with something as simple as an ACTUAL conversation could’ve eliminated both problems. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that though technology is fabulous and it’s great to have everything you need at your fingertips is that when it comes to something that’s really important to you – perhaps that’s a CONVERSATION to be had.

Sorry friends, if I’ve offended you in either one of these topics. Please, feel free to share your thoughts and opinions, as you know I always love hearing them.

And, remember, you have a CHOICE as how you let someone else’s thoughts and words effect your day. (Wow, that sounded like a line out of a reallllyyyy bad self-help book.)

Love you guys.

Happy Friday!
Xoxo
rye